Why does one exit the bridge to nowhere? One exits because one can no longer stand the path one is taking. Life is a journey, the destination at its end but the culmination of that life. Spending time in Scientology teaches one that the bridge is poorly constructed and may, and likely shall, fall apart while one is on the journey.

      One day you recognize that Scientology is the ultimate shell game. That it is essentially an MLM whose only goal is money and power. Members are coerced to bring in new bodies to the body router. Fresh meat for the registrars. The more money these people spend, the more money in the Org coffers, and the higher the commission for the FSM. How many churches do you know that have field staff selling services? Frankly, I do not know of any. Scientology is not a religion. It is rather like what the Beatles called the Magical Mystery Tour. The cult surrounds itself in mystery; secrets that can only be revealed when one is ready, sufficiently conditioned to be receptive to the materials at that level. There are many ways in which this is done. The first of which is that strange language known as Scientology speak.

      Scientology uses its own strange language to further isolate members from reality. When the individual is in disagreement with Scientology practices and beliefs, it is not the fault of Scientology. Rather it is the fault of the individual. This often calls for more Word Clearing. The purpose of Word Clearing is to inculcate the strange language that is Scientology. It is an egregious wrong for Hubbard to be wrong, therefore, it is surely the fault of the individual. As time and expense of Word Clearing in session becomes prohibitively expensive, the individual soon acquiesces and goes into agreement – or they start to question and ultimately depart the church.

      Once one begins to question they have embarked upon that ever so slippery slope. You know you no longer believe, and wonder if you ever did. You continue to ask questions that are met with stern faces and pompous responses. You then get involved in that rather intriguing, and intrusive, practice known as Scientology Ethics. You are assigned an Ethics Condition, which you are supposed to work yourself out of. This involves writing an O/W Write-up, which is further fodder for your ethics folder with which to haunt you following your departure. If this treatment continues, you will do one of two things. You will either submit; or you will depart. But you know this, you either have to change all you believe in and remain, or you will depart. Sometimes you depart with a bang, which I eventually did with much fanfare and upset. Others depart quietly and just stay "off lines," which I also did for a while. Nevertheless, the groundwork is there, it is firmly established, there is no choice other than to stay or depart. You simply have to make the decision which way to go.

      Frankly, it was my personal experience with Scientology that provided me with the personal insight to write my tag line: Doubt is not a crime; it is simply a reasonable reaction to tyranny.

      When you complain about church policies and practices, you are threatened with the loss of the bridge. That mythical bridge to nowhere, which they dangle as a prize. Staff will tell you, in their finest voice of disconnect and astonishment, that you are threatening your salvation. If you fail to yield to their authority, you will lose the right to go up the bridge. All hope of going Clear, of becoming OT, more able, fulfilled, and productive. This will be denied. They will take this away from you. You will be barred from services. You will be doomed to a humanoid existence. I recall being told there should be a willingness to part with all earthly possessions in order to climb the bridge. I apparently preferred my worldly possessions to a non-existent bridge.

      When the loss of the bridge fails to bring you in line, and if you are smart, you have raised all your defenses, you are threatened with disconnection. This is their ultimate threat; particularly when there are children involved. What motivates many people to stay involved with the cult, even if not going for services, is the threat of loss of loved ones. Place yourself in the position of losing your child, knowing that if you disconnect, the child will remain in scientology. You will never be allowed to communicate with that child. Have nothing to do with their upbringing. In fact, you will become a subject of ridicule and disdain. You will have become what Scientology hates most: a Suppressive Person (SP). Worse, you are an SP who is a former member.

      Those whom you cared for now despise you. You are subject to Fair Game. If you are a vocal critic, or cause problems in any manner, your folders are in the hands of OSA. Your former friends, auditor, family members are questioned about your departure. You know what they are going through, because some OSA hack has been screaming in your face about your traitorous methods, that you have stabbed those who cared about you in the back. That your actions have subjected those you have left behind to possible ethics handlings. You have been told you are a disappointment; that they had plans for you. And now, look what you have done. Appropriate dramatic head shakes and muffled voices of incongruity follow. However, you know longer care, you are free of this bunch and feel a marvelous lightness of being, a rather prophetic sense of irony, and the sheer joy of being alive.

      So, now you are out. I was particularly lucky. I had a career, family, home and friends devoid of Scientology. My normal life continued while I was a Scientologist. However, despite that, you do miss those you were close to. Unlike committed Scientologists, one simply does not shut off one's emotions as you would a valve. You wonder how your friends are doing. You wish them the best, even though you know some of them wish you the worst; and you know it is not their fault. The cult will do all within their power to portray you in the worst possible light. Remember, you are now the enemy.

      The church authorities tell those left behind their side of the story. These same individuals engage in selective editing, carefully crafted to portray you in the negative. All the while, their spin masters are engaging in rhetoric designed to enhance the positive attributes of the church. They tell the members, your former friends and loved ones, that you are now one of those individuals seeking to destroy the church, its good works, and its fraudulent bridge to nowhere.

      Left on your own you have to come to grips with the fact you made a really bad decision to join the cult. You doubt your own sanity; your ability think clearly. You wonder where your critical thinking skills went. Did you ever have any? How can you be successful and yet still fallen into this mess? How did you let yourself get into this mess? You feel as if you are plagued with the self-doubt of all the ages. Nobody who has not actually been there has any idea what you are experiencing. You are alone! More alone than you have ever been in your life because for the first time, you are plagued with self-doubt. You hesitate. You question abilities you thought were native.

      I was lucky, I came out in the age when their was the Internet. Fortunately, and another reason I spent so much time in Doubt and the Danger Formulas, I had been reading about Scientology on the Internet for almost about a year. Andreas came to my aid, and eventually I found Arnie, which led to other friendships.

      As a former member, you face entirely new fears if you go public. First, the church never overcomes a simple belief. As one ranking former member says: "They still think they own us." He is so on target. And why not? After all, these people remain within the confines of the Org. They are spoon fed Hubbard tripe. They are indoctrinated in the TRs (training routines), and subject to ethics handlings.

      Second, you are now entering the world of SPs. These are the very people the church told you were evil. And now look at you, you are there with them. Some are suspicious; especially those who have never been members. You hope you have done the right thing; but you certainly do not know for sure. Only time can tell that for certain. In the meantime, you follow your gut instinct. This still seems to work pretty well, unlike your mental reasoning powers, which you are still doubting.

      You think about those whom are left behind. The ones you love. Those who were friends, acquaintances. You wonder if they will ever find their way out. You hope so; you care for them and miss them. Above all, however, you are damn glad you are out of their clutches.

      It is rather funny, I think of myself as quite insignificant, yet my mere presence at an FCDC picket will "enturbulate" a staff member. Send them cowering telling me I am an SP. I even have my own DA page, thanks to the cult. I have another courtesy of the Mike & Virginia channeling Hubbard road show. You are bemused by all the attention, which you find peculiar. After all, these people are supposed to be mighty OTs. They are supposed to be cause of MEST. Able to communicate with anyone, anywhere, at anytime, about any topic. You suddenly discover that you retained those abilities. You recognize that over the years you have accomplished on your own what they are attempting to gain through auditing. You have power over them. These super beings are responding to you. To your actions! To your communications! To your activities!

      It is in this instance you truly recognize that it is irrelevant what Scientologists attempt to do to you. You will continue to win out over them. They can bend you, but they cannot break you. In fact, having failed to kill you off, they have simply made you stronger. You have won, you are at cause over the mighty Church of Scientology; and they are your effect.